I’ve been thinking lately about what it means to have a multi-generational church. And please understand that when I use the term “multi-generational church” I’m talking about having a variety of ages worshipping together in our weekend services. Right now, we offer programming for children through the 4th grade for all of our services, and we include programming for 5th and 6th graders on Sunday mornings at 9:00. Children who are in the 7th grade and above worship together with their families.
From time-to-time I have conversations with people who wonder why we don’t offer programming for 7th and 8th graders or even a separate worship service geared specifically for teenagers like in times past. At the same time, we have parents with children for whom we provide programming who choose to bring them into the main services for a variety of reasons. So what’s the right answer?
I don’t claim to have all the answers or to always be right on every issue, but let me just tell you what I believe about all of this: I believe in the value of multi-generational worship. I believe that there needs to be a place for families to worship together, and I believe that someone who is in the 7th grade and up is not too young to come to the main service. (I actually believe 5th and 6th grade is not too young to come into the main service, either). What happens when families worship together? I can think of a number of things. First, worshipping together creates a living legacy of faith and faithfulness. What impact do you think it has on your children to see you sing, and pray, and study God’s Word? What impact will it have on your children to take the Lord’s Supper alongside you and see how meaningful it is in your life? What kind of memories do you think this will create? Worshipping together as a family can create a living legacy of faith and faithfulness. Second, worshipping together provides opportunities to talk about matters of faith. In Deuteronomy 6, God instructs His people to take His commands and place them upon their hearts. He goes on to tell them to impress them on their children by talking about them when they are sitting at home, walking down the road, when they lie down and when they get up. Worshipping together as a family can provide the specific subject matter for these kinds of conversations. I’m not foolish or arrogant enough to believe that someone who is 12 or 13 is going to listen to and understand every single thing that I say from the pulpit, but I know that they will listen to and understand at least some of the things I say. And let’s not forget that the communication of God’s Word to anyone is more about the Holy Spirit than it is the preacher. Third, worshipping together creates unity in the church. I have serious concerns about what the long-term results are of developing age specific worship venues for every age in the church. Where will end? Today’s teens are tomorrow’s young adult; today’s young adults are tomorrow’s young parents; today’s young parents are tomorrow’s empty-nesters, etc. My concern is that making it your goal to program for every age has the potential to fracture the church and breed spiritual selfishness and immaturity. That might sound like an overreaction, but I’ve seen it happen. There are a lot of things that seem like a good idea in the moment but the long-term ramifications are not what we hoped for.
These are the things that I have been thinking about lately. I understand that not everyone will agree with me, and that’s okay. I don’t even mind if you share your disagreement with me (try to be kind…we all have the same ultimate goal).
Jesus cares,
Pastor Chris
One last thing…thanks for the positive way you responded to my offering appeal after the Memorial Day weekend. Our Memorial Day weekend offering was less than half of what it normally is. The next two weekend offerings were very strong. What a great church family!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
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Chris' Blog
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- Mount Pleasant Christian Church
- 381 N. Bluff Rd. Greenwood IN, 46142
Chris, well written editorial. Having 12 and 14 year boys now both attending service with us is a blessing and I no longer have to refer to our service as "big Church". The boys sit with their mouths hanging open during the message more than I like, but overall they're learning and being encouraged. Your thoughts are in tune with our little family's experience.
ReplyDeleteRalph Shiley
We LOVE to worship together as a family! I so enjoy sharing worship music together and sharing discussions that begin on the way home from the service and often carry over into the week...
ReplyDeleteWhen discussing the sermon that we all heard on the same weekend, our children have information at their fingertips and feel capable to join in the conversation with their own take on things...
To be able to share in these discussions at home and with other adults at church equips them and builds their confidence for those all important discussions (and decisions) that occur away from home.
My children have especially enjoyed their relationships with older adults in the church services who share pearls of wisdom and encouragement with them each week.:0) You know who you are!
I believe that the family that grows together spiritually stays together spiritually. Worshipping together has just made that easier to do for our family. Time and distance on earth will never take that "togetherness" away and being together for eternity is the final and greatest reward for that.
Praise God from whom all blessings flow!
Kathleen Hacker
For the first two years that the sibs were with us they were involved in children's programming. We enjoyed it, they enjoyed it...but as a child of a “non-instrumental/no-classes” country church I realized the value of having them in worship with me. It became very apparent to me one day last spring when I took them 'home' to visit my family and we worshipped again in this small church. Later that week the kids were STILL talking about the sermon and processing it out loud to me. I was amazed. The sibs were six and seven then.
ReplyDeleteImmediately I started bringing them to worship with me instead of children's programming...and within only months they had made a decision for Christ! They are eight, eight and seven now and far more spiritually mature than I was at that age! They are little sponges...and I credit their spiritual maturity (and my own!) in great part to taking part in 'adult' worship services at Mount Pleasant.
I have to admit that at first I felt some resistance to doing so…but I’m glad I persevered…and I’m glad to have so much positive feedback about the subject. I still get pressured to send the kids to children’s classes occasionally…but I know for sure that they are ready to be where they are and that I’m doing the right thing for them.
Thank you, Chris, for touching on this subject. It is comforting to have your choices validated…even if you know in your heart they are right. ;)
I also agree with your view on families worshiping together. My family had rarely attended church together growing up. My siblings and I always went to a small church close to our house, but my parents never went although I would see my dad reading his Bible at home quite often. No matter what the weather he would make sure us kids got to church. Later, when I was an early teen, my parents divorced and my dad remarried (although he didn't initiated the divorce). I know God hates divorce, but I also know God will bring good out of all circumstances if we allow Him. And thats just what he did in my dad's case. I remember when we first started attending church as a family. I was nervous. It was a much bigger church. During church service I would feel somewhat out of place singing and didn't really grasp all that was being said, but I would look at my dad alot and see how sincere he was in his singing and how engaged he was during the sermons. I could see that he had been missing that since of unity for many years and he knew he was back where he should be. I knew I wasn't anywhere near where he was in his walk, but watching him assured me I also was in the right place and that meant alot to me. If I would have went straight to my own class I would have never been able to see that. So glad I was there!
ReplyDeleteI'm now at that stage in life with one of our kids who is also a teenager. I don't know how much their grasping during your sermons (no offense! lol) but my husband and I always try to ask what the sermon was about during the ride home, so I know there is something gained. My hope is that my husband and I can show our love for God during church service together and it will have a positive impact on our kids just like my dad did on me. God is in Control...What a relief!:)
I was encouraged to post this. So here it is...
ReplyDelete--------------------------------------------
I’m not sure I’d agree that we should ever present ourselves for worship divided by generations. That seems so secular and it renders something close to an alarm in me. Certainly there is the true innocence of small children as they are unable to fully grasp the magnitude of accepting the life of Jesus Christ as their own and thereby gaining the life-long interest in them by the enemy of our souls. There are programs in the church that prepare them for the significance of living His life as presented in teachings of truth from the pulpit. I really believe that the early years should not be ignored. It's such a blessing to my heart that at this and many other churches even make those programs a priority.
While walking in Christ Jesus is deliberately not done by everyone in my family, it is always a blessing to bring my children to corporate worship and the preaching/teaching done by any of the pastors that stand at (or wander around) the pulpit. As for the affect on children, I don't think any of us should be surprised at what those sponges absorb any time after seven or eight years of age. I also believe that there are children with the capacity to start absorbing even before that.
Right about then, they start collecting the dots that will later be connected to one another. As the dots won’t immediately be connected, repeated participation in worship service renders a foundation of information in each of them as they absorb the bits and pieces of information. The dots seem to accumulate for a few years (maybe only a few months?) and then some toggle switch is thrown. The dots then begin to assemble themselves in an order that can often resemble catharsis. At the conclusions of lessons, it's fun to watch during a silent moment as you begin to detect the lights coming on.
Don't be disappointed if you see the lights coming on but there aren't any questions to field. The lights are provided by that powerful source called The Word and it can leave anyone, even children, in a state of awe that they typically won’t recognize, yet renders them quietly contemplative if only for a few moments.
So, when you bring them to corporate worship, a foundation of knowledge and understanding is being established for life long engagement in thoughtful conversation about spiritual matters. I thoroughly enjoy engaging in that. And, I’ve found that current conversations with them in their youth can be conducted on level ground, especially if approached with the humility that you’re a saint only because grace and blood were shed.
Now, when the lights start coming on in children, when some of the dots begin connecting themselves to one another, bring them into the place where the value is realized from the result of thorough study of scripture broken down into bite-size pieces and served to the hungry. When they start “getting it”, take them to the place where the can REALLY get the REAL TRUTH right along side of you so you can all get it at once and then co-exist within it.
So, again and again I bring them back to so many people congregating to acknowledge and worship the Triune, and to know that so many people near us open each of their hearts, each one a little differently, to satisfy its hunger for more of The Word. In that period, we are provided the opportunity to pause and search ourselves, to remember whom it is that we seek to compare ourselves, and then share a little supper between us with Him.
Finally, it seems that we can become known to our children for our obedience and the cheerful generosity of it. Something excellent happens in our children and their acceptance of an obedient nature when it’s led from the top.
Ok, I suppose someone should ask a few questions from the other side as well, just to keep things balanced. :) Great post, tho. Here's my thoughts...
ReplyDeleteMost of these reasons are focused on families worshiping together... but what about the kids & single adults, etc. who are the only believers in their families or don't have a family nearby to go with? There are quite a few of us in my group of friends (my parents came to faith a couple years ago, but before that it was just me too). In a large worship service, people group off with their families, and those without are left alone. And if you look at statistics, the number of singles in churches is starting to be larger than the number of families! Without a gathering of like-aged people to worship with, they are often isolated and feel left out.
I feel I can say this from experience. I came from a multi-generational church and joined MPCC because of the fellowship I found at One Accord when it existed. When that ended, I got involved in more ministries in the church, as well as small groups, volunteer roles, etc, but nothing has been able to match the level of fellowship I found when I was able to share life with other 20-somethings as a small part of the larger church. No matter how many groups I get involved in at MPCC, I still struggle with feeling out of place without a community like that.
I know you mentioned several age groups above, but since I'm from the 20-somethings I'll just focus on that one. The reason these groups are needed is because each one is in a unique place in life that is not shared or often understood by the others. Our group, for example, is full of people going through a lot of firsts. First time leaving home (college students), first "real" jobs, getting married, starting a family... we are making some HUGE life decisions in these years, and many of us feel we're doing so without the support of those going through the same things.
We get guidance from the older and more experienced members, yes, but I never said these groups should REPLACE worshiping together on Sunday. But why can't we have both?